Personal Training

I never saw this one coming.

If you told me that I would love to go to the gym, I would look forward to sweating, and that one day I would become an ACE Certified Personal Trainer, I would have looked at you like you were crazy. But now it’s true: fitness is a central part of my life. I can help you discover this for yourself.

Facing Fears

It all started when I confronted my lifelong dread of open water.

As a young child, I had two terrifying experiences: once falling into a pool and later being tumbled by a wave in the Atlantic Ocean. Even though adults were nearby to save me quickly, these incidents instilled a deep fear of deep water in my cells and my psyche.

Somehow graced with the determination to overcome this fear, I began private swim lessons at the local YMCA. It was an incredibly challenging experience that led to one unforgettable moment. After several winter weeks of waking up at dawn for lessons, after more than 20 hours in the pool convincing myself to wear my awkward swim cap and oddball waterproof earplugs, I found myself mid-stroke in the center of the pool. I felt something like a dial clicking into place. I sensed the moment the endorphins overcame the cortisol, the instant when pleasure chemistry overtook the stress complex—a clear shift from fear to achievement.

By the end of that summer, I’d be diving head-first into the ocean…

After my swim lesson one day, drying myself off in bemused disbelief that I was choosing to spend time in a locker room, I noticed that my YMCA membership included free personal training sessions. Intrigued, I gave it a try. My trainer was kind and present. She introduced me to the Nautilus machine circuit and tracking sheets. Metrics for tracking my progress harmonized with my neurotype and quickly became a virtuous cycle. I started going to the gym two, three, sometimes even five times a week. I soon realized I didn't know what I was doing or how to progress safely. Late-night YouTube rabbit holes led me to the idea of getting certified.

Personal Training + Spiritual Direction = ?!

As a spiritual director, I engage in intimate conversations. We share intuitive, prayerful, dreamlike contemplative spaces. Accompanying and attuning to others on these subtle and vast levels is one of my gifts and deepest pleasures.

Chassidic Masters explore the concept that there is a triune structure underlying all of creation: Thought, Word, and Action (מַחֲשָׁבָה דִּבּוּר וּמַעֲשֶׂה). There is a similar concept in Rudolf Steiner’s anthroposophy.

This is where personal training can offer something explicitly practical to spiritual conversations. Many of my clients seek tangible changes in their lives. The ACE approach to personal training is client-centered, goal-oriented, and research-based. Physical exercise enhances not only physical well-being but also supports emotional and mental health. Integrating fitness coaching with hashpa’ah integrates a transcendent “top-down” approach with a “bottom-up” transformative one.

Embracing neurodivergence

As a spiritual director, I have become adept at helping others overcome disenchantment. Dissolving obstacles to the physical embodiment of our values is a new frontier I’m excited to explore.

Autism has made certain elements of embodiment psychologically and emotionally challenging. For instance, the sensory aspects of swimming, such as the surprise of water splashing on my skin or the auditory assault in indoor pools, can be overwhelming. Similarly, the heat and sweat from exertion have in the past triggered massive shutdowns. Through compassionate self-witness and modifying my environment—using noise-canceling headphones, curating my music, and choosing the right attire—I have found ways to manage challenges. This journey has become a new special interest and passion and continues to enhance my self-understanding.

Discovering and embracing that I am on the broad and beautiful Autism spectrum has been truly liberating for me. It led me to the neurodiversity paradigm which celebrates the infinite organic variety of body-minds. With difference and divergence as something to be seen and celebrated, it empowers me to challenge the often pathological ways embodiment, and therefore physical engagement, is taught or modeled.

Exercise can be particularly challenging for nonbinary, genderqueer, or gender-expansive individuals who feel at odds with their physical presentation or how they are perceived. In my spiritual counseling, I cultivate an inclusive, empathetic, and supportive environment that celebrates your unprecedented pathway. I hope to extend this to exercise coaching.

Many people recognize the benefits of exercise and the need for accountability to get them moving. Fewer folks feel the same about spiritual direction or care. For me, both the physical and the metaphysical are deep needs. We are lifelong learners and constantly evolving beings. Paradoxically, individuals need socialization and regulation to fully grow. I love one-on-one work and want to support others in their fullness, exploring integration in all Four Worlds: body, heart, mind, and soul.

Please reach out if this appeals to you or forward this message along if you think it might touch someone you know.